Det var der sgu ikke mange bud på

Men rart at vide at jeg ikke er den eneste der synes det er et tricky spørgsmål.
Her er resten af mailen i sin fulde længde, hvis nogen skulle være intereseret:
AndyOrbit skrev:
rambling away into another lifetime..
For a while I believed I had dyslexia, but now all Im certain of is that my brain is constructed in a different way to most, thats not to say better or worse just different and so many teachers methods did not make much sense to me, it could take me ages to understand something others could fairly quickly, at the same time on pondering algebra the answer would just pop into my head.. being unable to show my workings to get to the answer however caused my maths teacher to suspect I had just copied. Right brained person in a left brain dominant world. But enough of that eh ?
It's interesting that psychadelics can confirm our believes eh ? .. some would say we are just super-imposing our own beliefs onto our drug induced realities but we know better right ? Faith is everything and when you believe you are capable of doing something on the lowest level you can. I believe I've seen energy on pychadelics, the fabric of the universe and everything within, I've watched in flowing in it's eternal dance somehow managing to weave/travel in all directions at once, I can only focus on a small area or particular flow and the rest is blured, when I have tried so hard to view more my head throbs and blood floods my brain... Im pretty sure the human brain overheats trying to comprehend infinity .. which in a way was what I believed I was trying to bring into focus.
Im not sure how dull travelling into another's phyical body would be, I wouldnt mind traveling into britney spears body and touching myself in various places ... I jest.
I agree that the world is constantly dictating rational for your mind to apply new limits to your potential concious. I feel lucky in a sense I feel like i spent the first 15 years of my life in a cocoon, ignoring as many limiting influences are possible, not intentionally but everyone told me I had my head in the clouds, daydreaming away like nothing around me really mattered, recently I wonder if I was being protected by a friendly sentient energy/spirit who I believe has been watching over me.
I stubbornly reject any direction that might lead me to a life looking like some tired business man, they seem so drained to me even while they puff out their chests and look to challenge anyone. I dont know.. I worked for a corperation once and the whole thing felt very wrong, so I quit. Story of my life Im afraid, unable to commit to what Im constantly told is the right thing by society. It's a two edged sword and Im not sure how to hold it at the moment, in one way I feel Im not doing myself justice by not being very active in society, that I have a lot of potential to fill, on the other hand I feel like societies game plan is a load of bullshit so why should I commit to that ?
Weird. Either way animals come to me, and baby's/children will often stare and smile right at me. I feel their is so much wisdom in those smiling eyes, a shame to know that much of that will be blinded with world rational in time. And what power is it that attempts to lead us astray so much I wonder ? The more I see the more I believe it is intentional. I guess this is where our opinions differ as recently I feel their are different influences at work in our universe, yes I believe that all is connected and that a universal energy is generated by and recieved by all but recently I am starting to think their are some third parties attempting to influence the colour/mood of this energy by manipulating human emotions.
It's strange because not long ago I would have said exactly what you are saying, I believed that we are god, a god that has woken up to find no mother/father and thrashes with bitterness at the world because it cannot yet understand it's own nature and so feel's lonely and unloved. Like other orphon children it lashes out against the world in a self-destructive manner. When you look around you these days you see much greed, selfishness, agression, self-defeating actions commited by the human race, war ... the moods and feeling in todays world mirror those of an orphon child in his/her teenage rebel stage. That is why I have so much hope for the future despite what we see today, because it is just a stage our relativly young race is going through and if people like you and I represent the future it is going to be one great ride when the race start's to mature
The only reason I feel like their may be other infleunces/thrid parties is because I feel like something has been gunning for me recently, that someone/thing is resentful of my attitude and wishes for things to remain the same. Is the child just being stubborn or are other parties involved also ?
I must wander a little now.. Im not sure If you knew about princess Diana ? She was what I call a new age spirit, she wished for change and believed in the kind of freedoms we are aimig for, because she was a role model for so many she was assasinated by someone who wishes for things to remain the same. Their are religious groups that I think are also more aware of our true nature and have been pulling strings for a long time too.
Who knows maybe Im just over anaylsing things. I too an currently unemployed and maybe just letting negatively turn to paranioa. I wish your country stregnth and you positive energy in what you are doing. Stay focused my friend.
Ps : I think you have same habit as me of writing huge emails that overwhelm people beyond replying. lol.. from now on I'll try to keep it a bit shorter eh ? dont worry about showing yourself to me, I know you well already.. your just like me